Porn Valley- Apparently action-central for cheeseball entertainment is the other side of the hill these days – poolside at the Hollywood Roosevelt Hotel. www.adultfyi.com/read.aspx?ID=10520 But that doesn’t mean it can’t happen in Porn Valley, either.

And if Defiance Films, www.defiancefilms.com mastermind Keith O’Connor has his way, the gongs of Chuck Barris will be heard loud and clear this Wednesday and Thursday. That’s because Defiance is holding a blowjob competition according to the struct rules and regulations of The Gong Show. Ten women have already been cast for the event. And it’s going to be held at the Str-8 Up Studios. The only thing that’s being left to chance- somewhat intentionally- are the selection of the judges. Reasons being that O’Connor wants to give fans a shot at doing that. Maybe somebody who lives nearby, he suggest. The idea that all of this is happening in quick time is also not unlost on O’Connor.

“But this thing’s going to get a lot of play,” he argues. “And based on the success of this, the next one will be more thought out and I’ll have more prep time.” For now O’Connor’s hedging a trifle because he doesn’t know how the event is going to be received. In the future, though, O’Connor might get as elaborate as flying winners out. “Yet I think this is something that could be special if we do it the right way,” he says.

“The worst case scenario is that we’re going to have three judges,” O’Connor continues. “The focus is not on the judges. The focus is on the contest. And the focus is on the host.” O’Connor elaborates. “We’re going to have the host riding around on a tricycle. We already got the props. We also have a 1975 pimp suit. [Undoubtedly raided from Wankus’s closet.]

O’Connor claims to have a guy who’s a dead-on Barris. “He’s got the same kind of hair that stands right up. His mannerisms and facial thing will just blow people away. And he’s naturally funny and tiny. We’ve got the gong. We’ve got it! And we’ve got a ten-foot hook.” O’Connor says he’s run some old tapes by his Barris. “He’s got it down.”

Adding to the hilarity is an unknown comic with a bag over his head who will be getting a blowjob.

“Day One we’ll have five girls,” O’Connor explains. “The winner from Day One comes back to the finals. Day Two, five girls and the winner of each gets a cash bonus. Then it’s going to be the two girls going against each other. “It’s going to be a cock-off.” The entrants are already booked and it’s going to be a surprise cast, according to O’Connor. “The key to this thing is, you’ll be saying how did we get these A-list girls to do a blowjob movie?”

Those who would like to be considered for a judge’s spot can write [email protected] You have to live in the area, can get to the set both days and have the physical capacity to wield a gong. The event starts 9 am both days.

“Those conditions met, then we’d love to have them as a judge,” O’Connor says. “Now is your opportunity to not only sit in on a porn movie, but to be a judge. I think this is going to be phenomenal.” O’Connor realizes that half the target age group weren’t even born when The Gong Show was vogue. “But it’s going to be funny that you’ll get it no matter what,” he says. “And not so cliche where you only get it if you saw the show. And for those people who remember The Gong Show, this is going to knock them off their seat. It’s going to be outrageous.”

Next month, according to O’Connor, Kelly Erikson’s going to hold a handjob competition. “Whoever gets the guy to come the most and the fastest gets to go to the next round.”