NYC- DON’T joke about women, donkeys and bestiality if you expect Joel Siegel to watch your movie. That’s what director Kevin Smith found out when the pun-loving “Good Morning America” film critic stormed out of a press screening of Smith’s “Clerks II,” which opens Friday – an act that’s sparked a vicious war of words between the two.
“Time to go!” roared Siegel to his fellow critics. “First movie I’ve walked out of in 30 [bleeping] years!” His tirade came 40 minutes into the long-awaited Weinstein Company sequel to Smith’s 1994 cult classic about two foul-mouthed Long Island convenience store clerks who razz customers and goof off.
In the scene that sent Siegel to the exit, the characters graphically discuss hiring a woman to perform sexual favors on a donkey. Siegel told Page Six: “It was so foul and mean and repulsive. I finally realized I could not say anything positive . . . I wasn’t ready for this kind of smut . . . I hope he doesn’t make any more movies.”
An apoplectic Smith fired back on his MySpace blog: “Getting a bad review from Siegel is like a badge of honor. This is the guy who stole his mustachioed-critic shtick from Gene Shalit years ago, and still refuses to give it back. This is a guy who seemingly prides himself on his own nyuk-nyuk wordplay. For ‘Pirates 2,’ he made us all titter with ‘Yo, Ho, Ho and a Bottle of Fun’ . . . He made us squeal with delight when he wrote, ‘Wheelie Good Time for “Cars.” ‘ I mean, Fozzy [bleeping] Bear laughs at this guy.”
And there’s more: “I don’t need Joel Siegel to [bleep] my [bleep] the way he apparently [bleeps] M. Night Shyamalan’s, gushing over his flick [‘The Lady in the Water’] before he’s even seen it, but [bleep] man, man – how about a little common [bleeping] courtesy? You never, never disrupt a movie, simply because you don’t like it. Cardinal rule of moviegoing: Shut your [bleeping] mouth while the movie’s playing.
“I don’t come down to your job and slap the taste out of your mouth for coming up with a line like, ‘ “Shark Tale” Is a Halibut Good Time’ – so don’t [bleep] with my stuff while it’s still screening . . . What are you, a 12-year-old boy cutting loose with your pals at a Friday night screening of ‘Scary Movie’ 4′ while your parents are in a theater down the hall watching ‘The Devil Wears Prada’? Leave the diva-like behavior and drama-queen antics to the movie stars, not the movie reviewer, ya’ rude-ass [bleep].”