Hey, if I had a dog with a face like yours, I’d shave his ass and make him walk backwards.” Proof that the old schoolyard taunt has taken on a life of its own, is the report in the N.Y. Daily News quoting a report in Newsweek: “More evidence that the end of the world is at hand: Newsweek magazine has discovered the phenomenon of bikini waxing for “upwardly mobile heterosexual men.” A beautician at an upper East Side salon tells reporter Holly Peterson: “It’s not their backs I’m waxing. It’s their balls.” Lidia Tivichi of New York’s Kimara Ahnert salon opines: “Without the hair, everything down there looks bigger.”

The N.Y. Post finally caught on to a story that we’ve know for ages. The Post writes: “OZ” actor Evan Seinfeld is taking the plunge into porn. The frontman for hard rockers Biohazard, who appeared in 40 episodes of the acclaimed HBO prison drama, will star in flesh flicks with his porn star wife, Tera Patrick, that will be distributed through adult industry giant Vivid. “This will be a lot easier than ‘Oz’ because I’m making love to my wife,” Seinfeld told us. “It’s a natural occurrence. It’s not a stretch.”

With all the rumors about the FBI, IRS and other government agencies being in Las Vegas the last couple of days obtaining information profiles of AEE attendees, it comes as no surprise that the government’s next step will be to assign color coding to airline passengers based on more snooping into your background. This will start next month. Will you be a red, yellow or green? washingtonpost.com/