Porn Valley- Monica Mayhem is now Tony Batman’s co-host on KSEX Thursday nights and Mayhem was talking about how she was sexually hung over from her work the day before. Batman imagined it was a repetitive routine of getting fucked, taking a shower and re-applying makeup.

“It becomes a pain in the ass,” agreed Mayhem. “You take two to three showers a day depending how many times you fuck.” Batman brought up the fact that Mayhem was getting all kinds of press for having done her first anal scene.”That WAS a pain in my ass,” she laughed. Asked if it hurt, Mayhem said not really, that she was very relaxed.

“It was great- it was a long scene; it was a hot scene,” she said. Batman noted the passing of Steve Irwin, and Mayhem, from Australia herself, said she never got to meet Irwin although her brother did.

“He called him a dick head,” laughed Mayhem. “He [Mayhem’s brother] goes up to him- he’s in the bar. He’s, ‘Hey mate, I don’t understand why all these Americans love you. We think you’re a bloody dick head.’ According to Mayhem, Irwin told her brother that he didn’t get it, either. ‘I’m huge in America.’

“That’s how we talk back home,” Mayhem added. “It’s not taken personally.” Mayhem said she felt bad because Irwin just had another baby.

“And I feel his daughter is going to grow up to be just like him,” she said. “She’s already holding them down at three.” Batman also mentioned that he was involved with the MDA telethon.

“I was on KCAL-9,” he said, noting that he had a lot of people who wrote him about it.

“I did the Italian-thing,” Batman said. “I had the shirt way open, and the blazer and the Italian horns flying through there; I had the pinky ring and every thing. So I’m sitting there and we go in. There’s about 15 or 16 of us who volunteered to work the phones during the telethon. Our group was called The Free Speech Coalition because they didn’t want to have all these adult groups in there. But this was the first year they let adult in there at all. Because they would accept the money before but they wouldn’t say it on the air where it came from. because they were ashamed of us.”

“That’s so fucked up,” stated Mayhem.

“I know, but that’s the way it is,” Batman continued. “It doesn’t matter. There’s a lot of churches out there that won’t accept money from the adult industry because they think it’s dirty money.

“Not the case here,” Batman continued. “Because Jerry Lewis and the telethon- they do a really great job for the kids at the MDA – so I was very happy to go and volunteer my time and my efforts. We promo’ed it for about six weeks on KSEX, even had Bob Dane on here plenty of times. We get there and it’s our first time to be on TV. So they shuffle us in and “I’m going where’s our seats? I’m checking to make sure that the Free Speech Coalition has its little signs for the TV. They have little signs on their phone desks so when you panned over to them on the TV, you can get some props for your company because you’re volunteering. So I’m looking for us and I can’t find our little signs. You motherfuckers- you’re going to fuck us over! I stayed up plenty of nights writing stuff just so everybody would know about this. Finally, I locate our signs and they’re all the way in the back against the wall. So we go all the way to the back and we sit down. I’m thinking we’re not even going to make it on TV. They’re going to shut us out and I say out loud to someone next to me in passing and not to any of the MDA volunteers- because I want to help anyway- I say to him, this is fucked up. They put us all the way in the back against the wall. I’m feeling like Rosa Parks right now. Like get in the back of the bus, bitch.”

Mayhem said she couldn’t believe that.

“That’s all I said,” stated Batman. “I went ahead and did my job. I answered my phones. I took the donations. I did what I was supposed to do.” According to Batman, during the breaks they’d bring in a new group of people and change the signs.

“Then they ask you if you want to do another segment- I said, yes, of course. We’re going to be here until midnight. We went there like 6 pm. So we waited outside, did our thing and hung out. When our next segment came up to be on TV, I walk in and I’m, like, I wonder where they’re going to put us this time? Being all cocky and everything. I walk into where the booths are. As we’re walking up, I’m, like, oh shit. I just fucked up. Front row- the whole circle of the front row for the Free Speech Coalition. They just rotate them.

“It was nothing against us and I’m sitting there complaining. I’m feeling like shit now- you guys rock. I love you! So we’re in the front row and the celebrity host who comes over to talk to us is Casey Kasem. He’s standing right in front of me and I’m thinking wouldn’t it be cool if I could say, hey, Casey, you have any favorite porn movies? But I don’t want to do it. I don’t want to fuck it up. Everybody’s the whole time, don’t say anything about porn while you’re there! So Casey’s there and he’s right in front of us. They pan over to show Casey on TV and they show everybody that’s on the front row. So we got our camera time. We did our good deed and before we got there we gave out a check to MDA and Casey Kasem. We gave a bunch of checks that were over $10,000. So the adult industry actually came through.”

According to Batman, AVN donated front row seats to the awards show to be auctioned off; Dino Bravo donated a scene and Anjelica Lauren donated a date.

“I wonder how much that’s going to be worth? I guess it all depends what happens during the date,” he mused.

“We put a little star on the adult industry in the mainstream world,” Batman continued. “Everyone was saying you’re going to fail! Because porn people don’t give. Porn people take. And for the most part, they’re right. If somebody in porn gets a chance to fuck you over they’re gonna.”

“I’m the giver and I get fucked over,” Mayhem agreed. “But what goes around comes around.”

Batman again lent out special thanks to Bob from Dane Productions who set up every thing.

“I can’t wait to do it again next year,” Batman added.

Bob from Dane writes in: Just got a call from nora, the gal in charge of all the people who worked the mda telethon labor day weekend. She told me that of all the people she had over the 2 day period manning the phones, and doing whatever needed to be done, our group was far and away the best as far as courtesy, kindness, and showing up before the required time. Can you imagine anyone in this industry showing up ahead of time?? She asked me if we could get the same people next year, so I am telling you far in advance, those of you that worked for us, please keep the date open. Who would ever have thought we would receive such a commendation?

Thanks again, Bob, Dane Productions.