Porn Valley- At first I’m wondering what Seymour Cassel’s doing dragging a dead body in a cardboard box into the PrimeTimeUncensored, www.primetimeuncensored.com, studios.
But it’s not the actor. And it’s not a dead body, although the legs draping out of said box remind you of the scene in The Wizard of Oz where the Wicked Witch of the East is plunked by a falling house.
The Cassel lookalike is actually fetish photographer Eric Kroll, [pictured left] who, if business gets slow, might also consider doing a Rip Taylor tribute show, such is that resemblance. But when it comes to photography, it’s not rolling eyeballs and confetti for Kroll who’s been shooting women from the time he was a teenager.
But this visit – a coup in of itself for PTU- wasn’t so much about Kroll’s personal history as it was the mystery behind the “chick in a box.” At least that’s what host Vanessa Blue kept calling it.
“You can’t beat THAT with a bat,” she grins.
“There’s a real person in this,” Velvet Rose reminds the audience, as if there’s a parlor trick involving saws, about to unfold. Yup, the legs are kicking.
I’m also thinking this is like a Senor Wences act on the old Sullivan show.
“S’okay in de box?
“S’okay.”
“Veddy good.”
Kroll’s patting down his brow from the effort of dragging this living museum display into the studio. And, hopefully, there’s a point to this before chick in a box gets served with fries and cole slaw.
Orpheus, a bondage master, who co-hosts this segment of Blue’s Friday night show, goes on to describe Kroll as “The Irving Klaw of our generation.” Klaw being the cat who shot Bettie Page more times than Lee Harvey Oswald shot Kennedy. Kroll, who serves primarily as a photo editor for Taschen Books these days, acknowledges the influence.
Rose says Kroll is someone she’d love to work with, and Blue, who’s done fetish, states it’s never been with someone of Kroll’s credentials. Kroll says his photography is his way of involving himself with sex. He cites one instance of involvement where he started spanking women and discovered he could masturbate at the same time.
“If you’re spankin’ and wankin’, that’s a serious thing,” Orpheus agrees.
Kroll, whose work has also appeared in Vogue and Time, contends that “everything stems from lust.”
“You might be the original party animal,” Orpheus contends. Kroll is also of the opinion that you have to live a long time in order to make good art. So much for the Mozart argument.
Kroll then whips out a travel size vibrator while chick in a box is discovered to be bound in multi-color Saran Wrap. Chick in a box has a name. It’s Lyxtra. She’s a very pretty Asian woman, slightly built, and is Kroll’s neighbor. Kroll explains that he bought the wrapping material at a Von’s, obviously sparing no expense for props.
Orpheus describes this process as mummification and says while he doesn’t include it in his own repertoire, he’s now seriously thinking about it. The ancient Egyptians may have beat him to the punch, however.
Kroll’s telling a story about how he did a similar thing to a girl in Belize and wrapped her to a palm tree. He never said what happened to the girl.
Orpheus then goes about the process of cutting a hole into Lyxtra’s enveloped pube area, and Kroll promptly makes her dance with application of the vibrator. Well, flap like a fish is a more accurate description, considering that she’s still bound and on her back. Orpheus is of the opinion that lots of guys like watching a woman being tied up and gagged. In some segments of society these are called kidnappers.
“You get a lot of pussy,” comments Blue. It’s not clear whether Vanessa’s asking or making a statement when she says this to Kroll. But Kroll says he does love eating it and, particularly, role playing. He was in such a relationship for seven years with a woman.
“Until she grew up,” Kroll smiles. Kroll ponders another question which he says is a good one but really doesn’t know the answer to it, namely: Do women in the lifestyle make better models?
Orpheus works gingerly on Lyxtra’s bindings with the BDSM equivalent of a Bowie knife. Judging by his ministrations, an exacto knife might not be a wise instrument of choice to use in this situation. One slip and Lyxtra has an unspecified breast reduction.
Underneath the UPS garnishments, Lyxtra’s completely naked except for stockings and heels. And Kroll says he was able to do the mummification job in two minutes. Except it takes Orpehus much longer to unravel her.
Where this came from, who knows, but on the subject of getting women to do your bidding as cheaply as possible, Orpheus claims all the cheapskate philosophy radio personality Tom Leykis espouses on the air with “Leykis 101” comes from him. After a description of one of his typical beach dates, Blue tells Orpheus she wouldn’t give him a handjob after that itinerary.
“Then you’re going to walk home, Orpheus tells her.
Lyxtra displays some scarring on her back and says this came as a result of fire play that took a wrong turn. Orpheus, who specializes in it, agrees that hers is a worst case scenario. Even so, Orpheus decides he’ll try his hand and requests some mood music.
The theme from Bonanza would seem appropiate.