LAS VEGAS- It just held a porn convention. Worldwide pornographers and pornographettes descended on this city of purity and chastity.

And, praise the Lord and pass the dice, who was the big attraction? Why, that sweet child who shot a bullet into the head of her married lover’s wife, Mary Jo Buttafuocco, then went to the can then came out then got married then had children then rekindled with Joey Mr. Charm Buttafuocco Himself then made a sex tape with her husband then peddled it.

Yes, dear friends, we speak of that blessed little darling Amy Fisher, who looks up to trailer-park trash.

Pure as the driven slush, Amy flew into Vegas [first class] with a beefy guy – maybe her mattressmate. They sat quietly. No autographs. No photographs. Nobody sensed who they were. Presumably it’s hard to recognize Amy with her clothes on. Anyway, rumor says they want their own reality/sexuality show, and what could be nobler for a little mother than Doing It naked on a video and making money off it? How else to pay for your children’s education?

Amy is an American original. Someday they’ll bronze her private parts