Porn Valley- Even though he was on the other end of the line I could tell that Skeeter Kerkove was beaming like the headlights on an old Studebaker.

Skeeter’s telling me he got all kinds of calls the other day for daring to call Max Hardcore a pansy. While other sites were busy droning the same-old, same-old Max got 46 months epitaph, people were shocked that Skeeter would go in that direction.

That’s because Skeeter and Max, once buddies, came to a parting of the ways several months ago. That’s when Max practically forced his new find Jenna James on Skeeter by having him shoot her.

Skeeter now realizes it was all a part of Max allegedly attempting to set him up on a drug bust to cut some brownie points with the Feds in his then upcoming obscenity trial.

Skeeter claims Max was wired trying to get Skeeter to make incriminating statements. The results? Skeeter and Max had a physical tussle. Skeeter claims Max was armed with a gun and a knife.

“He was trying to frame me that day on a felony that would have put me away for years, bro,” says Skeeter, noting that on the worst of occasions he’d have no more than two LAPD cars show up at his house on a beef. This time he had ten.

Another comment Max supposedly made to Skeeter to rile him up was Max telling him how he’s got a big house in Pasadena, while Skeeter’s got a bunch of little houses.

“That motherfucking piece of shit,” says Skeeter. “My fucking Arizona house isn’t that much smaller than his house. And mine is paid for. That cocksucker. And that’s one of the numerous properties I own bought and paid for that fucker.” And Skeeter just a couple of weeks ago bought a ranch in Arizona.

“The last time he and Layla Rivera were at my house he tried slamming my $25,000 Presidential Rolex. Layla told him you’re jealous that he has a watch like that. What the fuck was that? Max stared, slamming me about the watch saying it wasn’t for real. I took it off and said feel the weight of that gold.”

Skeeter was home alone minding his own business, dressed like a quarter-ounce cocaine dealer- his words- when Max pulled up in his yellow Corvette, Max wearing a Hawaiian shirt and cowboy hat.

Later on that Sunday when the ten cop cars showed and Skeeter felt certain that Max was wired, Max tried getting Skeeter to say more incriminating things about shooting without permits.

“What the fuck, motherfucker, you’re pumping girls full of cocaine and booze and fucking ‘em up. Every time I said that when he had his little walkie-talkie on, Max kept repeating this ain’t about me. This is about you.”

Skeeter remembers a time Max was fucking Nikki Nievez so bad in the backyard by Max’s pool that she was bleeding from her throat and her nose.

“He puts a little needle in that five inch penis. He’s got it down on how to pee while having a hard penis. Max’s penis never goes soft in a movie- for the past eight years- because he learned the magic of Caverject. He’s really got it down.”

“The police came and she was crying and vomiting blood from the total abuse and insanity. Nikki told the cops I am high but I didn’t do the drugs here. She said that to protect Max. Then Max told her I can’t pay you because we didn’t get a finished scene and you’ll have to come back another day. So he gave her a little more drugs and she left. She clearly told me that. So when I brought that up to Max he had a fit because he had that wire on.”

“Nikki would call me Uncle Skeeter and tell me how Max was taking care of her and how the lady at Max’s house cooks for her. I told her as long as you’re happy. But you’re not going to be there for long. When Layla [Rivera] comes back to town she’s going to be jealous. And there’s going to be a problem because Max pays for Layla to be his girlfriend. Cause he’s a trick.”