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Just Like the Show, Charlie Shot His Load in Two and a Half Minutes; Kept Kissing Jacey Jordan’s Feet

from www.eonline.com – While Charlie Sheen is now (hopefully) getting himself better in rehab, his porn-star pal Kacey Jordan is dishing more details to E! News about her wild night with the Two and a Half Men star before his hospitalization last week.

The two had allegedly partied hard during a reported 36-hour binge, during which Jordan claims she witnessed Sheen drinking and smoking cocaine “for hours” and thought he seemed like he was on a “mission for suicide.”

And exactly how was Sheen in the sack? (TMI alert!)

“It was OK,” Jordan tells us. “It didn’t last very long.”

While Jordan was surprised about their “quick” romp, she has a theory why it was so brief.

“Because he was so f–ked up,” she claims. “When you’re that high…his performance wasn’t very long.”

By her count, Mr. Two and a Half Men clocked in at just over two and a half minutes. She alleges he later made some “excuses” for his abbreviated performance.

“It was a three-minute ordeal,” Jordan says of the hookup, which happened right before she left his house.

“After sex we just sat in bed and he held on to me. He was sloppy but still functioning, [he] wouldn’t stop kissing my feet. He promised me he’d get me a Bentley.”

Jordan claims Sheen was so much the worse for wear that she felt bad leaving, but did and went directly to deposit the check he wrote her for $30,000. She got her money, too.

“He’s the nicest guy, kind, sweet,” she says. “But for my safety, if I didn’t leave, I’ll be on a stretcher in the hospital. I sent him a text asking for the other $25,000.”

Sheen’s reps issued the following statement in response to Jordan’s allegations: “It is a shame that during this time, while Mr. Sheen has sought treatment on his own, opportunistic women are trying to take advantage of his celebrity status.”

Jordan also swung by Good Morning America, where she claimed that Sheen even approached her about some unorthodox childcare—a statement that prompted a quick retort via Twitter from his ex Denise Richards:

“If you caught GMA today..FYI.. No ‘adult film star’ will be babysitting our kids!”

Too bad for Jordan—we can only imagine how much Sheen pays for that…

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