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Fishnets- A Review

Porn Valley- There’s four immediate ways of dealing with a tsunami. One is be super model Petra Nemcova where good looks combined with personal tragedy land you a blockbuster book deal about how you found your late boyfriend in dry dock with dead fish in his pants pocket. The other is to leave instructions on how your next of kin can collect massive relief checks. But, if all else fails, you can always run to the roof of the luxury hotel you’re staying at in Cambodia and pray to God it’s the Empire State Building. Then there’s one more option. You toss your net into the swell and hope for the motherlode of catches.

Other thoughts, more immediately gratifying, might surface during a viewing of Fishnets, a slick, crisp piece of work directed by Greg Alves from Zero Tolerance Entertainment. But the one that struck me the most is that with this movie’s unique fishnet packaging, who accepts the award for best boxcover design. A fishing boat captain? Because with a title that’s destined to be the motherlode of catches, somebody’s got a money-making concession going here.

Descriptively, Fishnets stars seven beautiful ladies adorned in a vast array of intimate apparel designed with that specific texture. And in a running time of nearly two and a half hours, Sandra DeMarco, Patricia Max, Lucy Lee, Lucy Love, Thalia, Jane Darling, Stacy Silver and Jennifer work the reverse striptease principle in high fashion with scenes shot indoors and outdoors. Yeah, baby, put it on. A little primp, a little strut, some foot and leg fetish, a guy here and there and a lot of butt fucking.

Lucy Lee, a beautiful woman who’s fully capable of two cocks in her orifice sets the tone when four fingers wind up in her ass, and from there the math becomes a dizzying blur of anal, double vags and a twin cocktail of male bleach in her mouth upon conclusion of the scene. Then you have Stacy Silver, a damned near perfect blond heart stopper whose luscious calves and beautifully arched feet get shown to their fullest when she gets ass blasted in the reverse cowgirl, Silver keeping balance with her suck-worthy toes.

A similar fuck me in the ass and tell me that you love me vibe is realized from watching the gorgeous Jennifer propping her incredible butt for an afternoon of frivolous rectal insouciance. And in their threeway, Lucy Love and Thalia prove its an active day on the dick-in-the-ass exchange with stocks trading high in side saddle and pile driving futures. This is followed by another threeway, this time outdoors, with Sandra DeMarco and Patricia Max sharing anal assignments.

Then another outdoor pairing gains added perspective in the Behind the Scenes features portion of the DVD. The highly animated cock sucking of Jane Darling is matched with the ruggedness of Dillon Day. An interviewer asks Darling if she’s having fun. Quasarman who’s shooting camera, responds that being sodomized on a wooden bench is like a day at Magic Mountain. Except for maybe the splinters in your ass.

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