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I confess. I got so caught up in the John Travolta Homo/masseur lawsuit that I lost all track of time.

I finally got around to calling the Dayton Ohio Police Dept. telling them I was looking for facts in a case regarding Mike South and this stripper named Brandy Lynn Daniels from the Flamingo Strip Club.

I didn’t want to tell the police that all I knew was what the Tarot cards had told me so I kinda bullshitted my way around that. When I threw in the word Vandalia, the cops in Dayton told me to call the cops there.

This case involving 4th degree menacing which I’m sure is nowhere as grievous as 1st degree manslaughter, is on the Vandalia court docket for a hearing, June 4th.

I’m telling all this to the Vandalia cops who are telling me the person I need to talk to is gone for the day. I’m calling at noon which means it’s three o’clock their time, and the person’s gone for the day? I want that job.

The lady cop, though, gives me the courthouse number and I’m jockeyed around to a couple of different extensions. I have the case # and everything but nobody seems to know any more than I do.

“It’s 4th degree menacing,” say two different ladies. Like as if I didn’t know this already. I tell them I know this, already, that the case has been active since last November, that I need to know more. I want the dirt. I want to know exacty what happened.

“Then you’ll have to talk to the prosecutor,” this woman named Karen tells me and she switches me over to the prosecutor.

“What do you want to know?” the prosecutor with the gruff voice asks me.

I explain to her, as I did to my buddy Karen, that this is like a TMZ.com – type of story involving Mike South who’s a personality in the adult entertainment business and that there’s all kinds of rumors surfacing about lawyers, guns and money and drugs and bullet holes and dead bodies and I needed to set the record state.

Lady prosecutor says I need to talk to the cops.

“But the cops told me to talk to you,” I said.

“No, you have to talk to the cops,” she insisted.

“But I can tell you this. The circumstances indicate there will be a plea.”

A plea to what exactly? Conspiracy to commit menacing? The details will have to wait till tomorrow at 4:30 AM, my time, for fear the records people at Vandalia are already gone for the day.

Meanwhile, I get an email. Sleepless in Dayton writes me: “Mike South has lied and pissed off so many people up here that Im sure he wouldnt want to be caught alone walking down the street. For months he told everyone that he OWNED the Flamingo Club…when in fact he didnt at all.

“He lied to eveyone around here. people want to see him get what he deserves for sure. for someone that promotes himself as an advocate of the adult industry ive never heard more terrible things about him being a woman hating asshole.”