Emily Nagoski, a writer, educator, and researcher, discussed her career trajectory, the challenges facing sex research, and upcoming projects during an appearance in Los Angeles. Nagoski highlighted the impact of federal funding cuts on sex research and the potential influence of AI on relationships and education.

Career and Academic Background

Emily Nagoski's career began with a master’s degree in counseling from Indiana University, followed by a PhD in Health Behavior with a minor in human sexuality from Indiana University School of Public Health. She worked as a researcher at the Kinsey Institute and later served as the director of health wellness at Smith College in New England. She held this position through the success of her first book.

Nagoski’s 2015 book, “Come As You Are,” became a New York Times best-seller. The book focuses on the psychological aspects of sexuality, particularly women’s attitudes, and adopted a positive approach to sex, presenting a "you are normal" perspective rather than focusing on problems related to arousal and desire. After five years of reader feedback, Nagoski updated "Come As You Are" with new science, language, and perspectives, and recorded a three-part audio preface to explain the updates.

Nagoski described her professional evolution, stating that she began as a scholar when writing "Come As You Are" and had to unlearn academic writing. She now views herself as a "bridger" and "translator" between academia and the general public. Her interest in communication began in 1995 during college and graduate school in Indiana, where she volunteered as a peer health educator, discussing topics like conception and condom use in residence halls.

Nagoski is also the author of "Come Together: The Science (and Art!) of Creating Lasting Sexual Connections," which is available in paperback. A workbook for "Come Together" is scheduled for release in October 2026 from Bridge City Books, and a related card deck, "The Come Together Emotional Floor Plan," will also be available.

Challenges in Sex Research and Education

Nagoski expressed frustration regarding federal funding cuts affecting sex researchers, therapists, and educators across the country. She noted that Project 2025 explicitly aims to eliminate funding for fields like hers, leading to a "scrappy struggle" to conduct work in the field. She also highlighted the emerging impact of AI on education and research, questioning whether AI relationships count as "real" relationships and how to support human connection when AI alternatives are readily available. Nagoski emphasized the need for research into AI's impact on individuals of all ages, from tweens to the elderly.

Regarding generational changes in sexual attitudes, Nagoski observed that young people experience significant anxiety about sex before they engage in it. They worry about finding partners with similar preferences, about not having sex, and about maintaining long-term relationships without sex. She noted a lack of understanding among young people on how to integrate sex into relationships or sustain them, and how to have difficult conversations. Nagoski suggested that the social development of high school students during COVID-19, coupled with increased online interaction, has contributed to a lower tolerance for discomfort and a lack of face-to-face communication skills among young people. She also stated that while Gen Z embraces diversity, a lack of clear "rules" or scripts leaves them unprepared to understand their own bodies and sexual preferences, and that sexually explicit material does not serve as sex education.

Nagoski stated that she would not return to an academic setting for many years, drawing parallels to challenges faced during the second Bush administration, which involved filters on grant applications. She indicated that the current situation is "much worse" than in 2004.

New Projects and Appearances

Nagoski, along with her identical twin sister Amelia, is developing a project tentatively titled "Orgasm the Musical." Emily, the academic, and Amelia, the musician, are collaborating on this project. Emily explained that after answering the same sex questions for thirty years, she sought a new approach to make the work enjoyable. Amelia has written the songs for the musical. Nagoski is scheduled to appear at The Ripped Bodice in Culver City at 7 p.m. today for a reading and performance.

Key Facts

  • Emily Nagoski is a writer, educator, and researcher with degrees in health behavior and counseling, with concentrations in human sexuality and women's well-being.
  • Her book, “Come As You Are,” was a New York Times best-seller in 2015 and has since been revised and updated.
  • Nagoski is also the author of "Come Together: The Science (and Art!) of Creating Lasting Sexual Connections," with a workbook and card deck forthcoming.
  • She expressed concerns about federal funding cuts for sex research and the potential impact of AI on relationships and education.
  • Nagoski is collaborating with her twin sister, Amelia, on a musical project tentatively titled "Orgasm the Musical."
  • She is scheduled to appear at The Ripped Bodice in Culver City on September 15, 2026, at 5:50 PM.