Porn Valley- Wankus returned to the KSEX wars Monday night after a week in Pittsburgh where he was accompanying Tyler Faith who was doing a dance gig at Club Elite. Prior to bringing Shelley Michelle on, Wankus continued with his attempts to bring Mary Carey to the station by scattering theoretical bread crumbs from the door of Kick Ass Pictures to KSEX. So far Wankus has offered Carey a pepperoni pizza and a gift certificate to Sizzler. Monday night he added a Baker’s dozen of cream-filled Krispy Kreme doughnuts to the pot. However, George Bush and the Republicans were offering more and Carey was paying for the privilege to be on their show.
Wankus noted that Michelle had been a body double for Kim Basinger and Michelle mentioned that she’s doubled for over 100 stars but is now making a mark as an action hero. Wankus announced that Michelle just had a baby girl five months ago and looked great. The daughter’s name is Michelle. Wankus likened the practice to George Foreman naming all his kids George.
In getting the traditional station pat down for secret weapons, Michelle said she didn’t breast feed because it messes up the boob job. Michelle was then talking about how her nipples grow inward and that someone at Adultcon asked if someone bit it off. Michelle says she used to paint them to make them look bigger. Wankus said he didn’t like nipples that were way too big. “Some girls have nipples that are flat across their tits- nasty.”
He wanted to know if there were any action heroes with inverted tits that the audience needed to know about. Michelle explained that she’s been in a mainstream film called Galaxy Hunter and that she wanted to show people she can act. Michelle co-wrote the movie, brought in an investor and mentioned that she has a sex scene in it as well. Michelle said she really fucked in that scene, confirming a statement made by Esai Morales when he was on KSEX that actors for the most part really get it on in those scenes. Michelle said that’s her job as a fill-in to make those people look great in their love scenes. Michelle mentioned that she filled in one time for Anne Archer in a scene with Dennis Hopper. “He wanted to direct the scene. I said if it feels good it probably doesn’t look good for a mainstream sex scene.”
That’s when Wankus threatened to bring on a friend of his- Mitch, who’s a mainstream costume designer. But Wankus said no one like Tommy Lee Jones would be outed for being a dick. No sirree. Michelle said her movie was out on DVD and would have a Showtime airing July 4 at 10 pm. Michelle, www.bodydouble.com, said she’d be throwing a party at The Key Club to celebrate it as well. Michelle said that Stacy Keach plays her father in Galaxy Hunter. “But the guy who plays my love interest was so nervous because I know what I’m doing with body doubling.” Michelle said the guy was Jack Daniels nervous, in fact. “He was shaking.” Michelle said it would have been nice had the guy got more passionate than what he did.
Her next film is Jane Blond Double D-7. Michelle said that she also produces for Playboy. “Sexier stuff- and I have a lot of shows there.”
Asked what other things she was up to, Michelle, also a singer, said she was working on her third CD which would include lounge singing and that she has a book coming out detailing her secrets about the stars. “Julia Roberts didn’t want me to touch her bra.” Michelle said Roberts for some reason had a thing about the bra but really wasn’t a bitch to her.
Michelle said she was going to perform with Eddie Money this weekend and that a lot of her CD sales tend to go to the military. Michelle couldn’t believe she’d be performing for 10,000 of the Armed Forces and that’s she a sucker for a guy in uniform.
Wankus asked how she got hooked up with Money. Michelle said the record company Razor Digital wanted her to perform for the military. “It turns out I’m Miss Armed Forces. They couldn’t believe I had a great following.” Michelle was asked if she’s shot any hardcore porn. She said she’s produced and starred for Playboy where she has simulated sex. Wankus then brought up the subject of the father of Michelle’s baby. Michelle said he’s a chef and she’s known him forever. “We decided o get together after many years- it was time to settle down. We’ve been married almost two years.” Michelle was laughing because some guy e-mailed her about doing a private one-on-one for his birthday.
“I don’t do that any more.” Michelle said she used to do them and was asked how far she took her privates. “I’m a good dancer and I’m a good tease,” she answered but kept saying she doesn’t do porn. Michelle was of the opinion that if the price was right, any one can be bought.
Michelle mentioned that she was also doing infomercials for some abdominal product. Michelle also said if fans went to her other website, www.shelleyssecrets.com and bought her adult DVD’s they’d get a free CD. Wankus than cajoled his friend Mitch, a costume supervisor, into coming on the couch. “He’s a costume designer for Hollywood and is a good guy.” Wankus mentioned that he met Mitch coaching his son in Little League. “Mitch is a fantastic athlete himself.” Some of his credits include Men in Black. It was noted that he also worked with Michael Jackson and that Jackson was high maintenance. The first two Jurassic Parks as well as Outbreak are also in his resume. Co-host Rebecca Love then shot out that Dennis Hof was in Outbreak. She meant to say Dustin Hoffman. Mitch said Hoffman was a very cool guy.
When he mentioned a John Goodman movie, Mitch was asked if the actor was nice. “We want to know who the nice guys are, who the assholes are,” said Wankus. Mitch said Goodman wasn’t happy about putting his leather costume on in The Flintstones. To which Love said she wants to do Goodman. Among the nice people, Mitch mentioned Gary Oldman. “He was super fun.” Although Alec Baldwin has a “bad reputation,” Mitch found him fun to work with. “He has a reputation for being a hot head and stuff. I don’t think it’s really true. I think you have to go out of your way to piss him off.”
Mitch said Kim Basinger was very cool, likewise Meg Ryan. Michelle said she fell out of a shower for Ryan in a movie. Michelle said she met Basinger and thought she was a hot head. Wankus heard that she was psycho. Wankus then tried to get Mitch to name a few pains in the ass. He said he wouldn’t go there. “Who’s the high maintenance piece of shit? That’s what we want to know!”
At the mention of Sandra Bullock’s name, someone from the chatroom asked if Cytherea’s Brian had, indeed, fucked her. Wankus said Brian got Bullock to go back to the hotel room with him in Vegas. “But he was so coked out, he couldn’t get a hard on. He blew it.” Mitch said Bullock is one of the few female stars who has a guy dress her. Regarding Tommy Lee Jones, Mitch would just say he was hard to work with. “At times.”
Asked if his was a career that paid well, Mitch said the traveling gets old after awhile. “But I’ve been all over the world doing it. I’ve had great experiences.” Asked if he banged any of the actresses, Mitch said it was a New Zealand actress that no one would no. “I can’t even remember her name.” But Mitch remembered one night in Jamaica on Prelude to a Kiss that Alec Baldwin’s photo double was screaming at the guard on a set, “Let my hookers in. And the guard wouldn’t let them in. There was two hookers standing there and he was screaming. I thought that was really great. The guy’s name was mud for the rest of the show.”
Michelle said celebs have asked her to party and that a lot of them are big drinkers and big partyers. Wankus had a Melanie Griffith story, that the day he was on the set of Bonfire of the Vanities, she was hammered. “The director [Brian De Palma] was screaming at her because she was so fuckin’ hammered. It was a full set day.” According to Wankus, Griffith’s brief line had something to do with sucking a penis. And De Palma’s yelling at her for being stupid.