You get kissed one time by Eve Plumb of the Brandy Bunch and have your balls busted.
I note that Sean of www.pornlegends.com, in making his NFL picks for the week has come up with a whole new bunch of rib ticklers aimed at Skeeter Kerkove.
Bearing in mind that Skeeter, who has pat pending on the anal creampie, was laughing all the way both to the bank and the Bahamas as I read these to him. Then he said something about a case of Steel Reserve being like a box of chocolates.
Whatever he meant by that, the following is this week's NFL schedule followed by Sean's picks and the Adultfyi prognostications.
Sunday: Tennessee at Houston; Baltimore at Buffalo; Tampa Bay at Detroit; Arizona at Washington; San Francisco at NY Giants; Atlanta at New Orleans; New England at Miami; Kansas City at Oakland; NY Jets at Cincinnati; Minnesota at Dallas; Chicago at Philadelphia; St. Louis at Seattle; Pittsburgh at Denver
Monday: Indianapolis at Jacksonville
Sean sez: I am currently writing a biography about famed porn producer, Skeeter Kerkove. Below are his NFL picks and a few amazing tidbits about his life. Mr. Kerkove truly is the Forrest Gump of porn.
Detroit over Tampa – Skeeter’s first writing credit was the Brady Bunch episode in which Marcia was hit in the face with a football. The original script had Greg getting hit in the balls, but Brandy Bunch creator Sherwood Schwartz felt it was too violent for TV.
New Orleans over Atlanta – Skeeter was Howard Hughes’ co-pilot when Hughes flew the Spruce Goose.
Baltimore over Buffalo – Skeeter was the lead blocker for OJ Simpson at USC when OJ won the Heisman Trophy in 1968.
Washington over Arizona – Invented the color “Eastland Gold” for the Sherwin-Williams company.
Tennessee over Houston – Came up the phrase, “Get back, Jack.”
New England over Miami – Fucked Liza Minelli in a cab in Times Square on New Year’s Eve 1984.
Giants over San Francisco – Talked Jimmy Carter into granting Playboy an interview in 1976.
Oakland over Kansas City – Gave Bill Gates the idea for forming Microsoft.
Cincinnati over Jets – Only living member of the famed “Rat Pack.”
Dallas over Minnesota – Tied the rope around Saddam Hussein’s neck before he was hanged.
Seattle over St. Louis – Won an eating contest in 1994 when he consumed six dozen hard boiled eggs in two minutes.
Philadelphia over Chicago – Spent four years in the Hanoi Hilton with John McCain.
Pittsburgh over Denver – Played the oldest Von Trapp son in the movie “Sound of Music.”
Indianapolis over Jacksonville – Was voted prom king at both his high school and during his stay at Rahway State Prison.
Karl The Birdman [60-29]: Washington, Atl, Buffalo, NE, NY G, Detroit, Houston, KC, NY Jets, Dallas, Chicago, Seattle, Denver, Indy
Sean from www.pornlegends.com [58-31]: Washington, NO, Baltimore, NE, NY G, Detroit, Tenn, Oakland, Cincy, Dallas, Philly, Seattle, Pittsburgh, Indy
Dan Davis [55-34]: Washington, NO, Buffalo, NE, NY G, Detroit, Houston, Oak, Cincy, Dallas, Philly, Seattle, Pittsburgh, Indy
Willie D [55-34]: Washington, NO, baltimore, NE, NY G, Detroit, Tenn, KC, Cincy, Dallas, Philly, Seattle, Pittsburgh, Indy
Indiana Adam [55-34]: Washington, NO, Baltimore, NE, NY G, Detroit, Hst, Oakland, Cincy, Dallas, Chicago, Seattle, Denver, Indy
Tony Batman [54-35]: Washington, NO, Baltimore, NE, NY G, TB, Houston, KC, Cincy, Dallas, Chicago, Seattle, Pittsburgh, Indy
Gene Ross [53-36]: Washington, NO, Buffalo, NE, NY G, Detroit, Tenn, Oak, Cincy, Dallas, Philly, Seattle, Denver, Indy
Billy the Crystal [53-36]: Washington, NO, Buffalo, NE, SF, Detroit, Tenn, Oak, Cincy, Dallas, Chicago, Seattle, Denver, Indy
Steve Seidman [53-36]: Washington, NO, Baltimore, NE, NY G, Detroit, Houston, Oakland, Cincy, Dallas, Philly, Seattle, Pittsburgh, Indy
Mike Dickinson [53-36]: Washington, NO, Baltimore, NE, NY G, TB, Tenn, Oakland, Cincy, Dallas, Philly, Seattle, Pittsburgh, Indy
Jack Spade [52-37]: Washington, NO, Buffalo, NE, NY G, Detroit, Houston, Oakland, Cincy, Dallas, Philly, Seattle, Denver, Jax
Mastrick [51-38]: Washington, NO, Baltimore, NE, NY G, TB, Tenn, Oakland, Cincy, Dallas, Philly, Seattle, Pittsburgh, Indy
Tim Case [51-38]: Washington, NO, Buffalo, NE, NY G, TB, Houston, Oakland, Cincy, Dallas, Philly, Seattle, Pittsburgh, Indy
John Gray [51-38]: Washington, NO, Baltimore, NE, NY G, TB, Houston, KC, Cincy, Dallas, Philly, Seattle, Pittsburgh, Indy
Ryan from Jerry's Deli [50-39]: Washington, NO, Buffalo, NE, NY G, TB, Tenn, Oakland, Cincy, Dallas, Chicago, Seattle, Pitt, Indy
Serenity, www.serenity.net [48-41]: Washington, NO, Buffalo, NE, SF, TB, Houston, KC, NY J, Minn, Philly, St. Louis, Denver, Indy
Sandy Bunz, www.sandybunz.com [47-42]: Washington, NO, Buffalo, NE, NY G, TB, Tenn, KC, Cincy, Dallas, Philly, Seattle, Denver, Jax
Steve Lane, www.serenity.net [44-45]: Washington, Atlanta, Buffalo, NE, NY G, Detroit, Houston, Oakland, Cincy, Dallas, Chicago, Seattle, Denver, Jax
Brian Wallace [42-47]: Washington, NO, Buffalo, NE, SF, Detroit, Houston, Oakland, Cincy, Dallas, Chicago, Seattle, Denver, Indy
