After last week's abysmal showing in the Adultfyi pool, the theme of Week 5 is ain't that a kick in the nuts. At least it may seem that way to some Andy Reid fans- and there are a few of them out there.
This week the Daily Examiner reported that Reid is ready to call it quits in Philly, not because of the Eagles' abominable performance on the field, mind you, but because his sons can't seem to keep their hands off the Peruvian marching powder.
Talk is that assistant coach Marty Mornhinweg is ready to take over with Reid assuming the duties of Vice President of Football Operations. But the best news of all is that this is more than likely Donovan "12 sacks" McNabb's last season.
For those who mourn the passing of Andy Reid, this is our suggestion: watch today's Seattle Seahawks game. We've always been convinced that Reid is actually 'Hawks coach Mike Holmgren and our wish would have been to see Seattle and Philly in a game just to prove that one of those guys would be missing from the sidelines since you can't be in two places at once.
Now over in Green Bay, Brett Fav-ruh and his five o'clock shadow has lead the Pack to something like 8 straight wins including last season. Brett, as you know, last week passed Dan Marino's record for TD passes in a career. With the Bears ready to start anyone at quarterback including Donovan McNabb or Andy Reid, it might just be Green Bay getting off to a 5-0 start. And with them facing Washington next week, they've got to be feeling pretty good.
This game over in Pittsburgh with the Seahawks, a rematch of the 2005 Super Bowl, has got us worried. If Andy Reid shows up to coach for Seattle, then it's Pittsburgh in a heartbeat. But last week the Steelers were minus Hines Ward and while we thought that wouldn't be the decisive factor, it certainly was; and Ben Worthlessberger lived up to his name. And, oh fuck, Ward is out of the lineup again this week.
Here's this week's schedule followed by Sean's picks and the Adultfyi prognostications.
Sunday: Miami at Houston; Atlanta at Tennessee; Jacksonville at Kansas City; NY Jets at NY Giants; Carolina at New Orleans; Arizona at St. Louis; Cleveland at New England; Seattle at Pittsburgh; Detroit at Washington; Tampa Bay at Indianapolis; San Diego at Denver; Baltimore at San Francisco; Chicago at Green Bay
Monday: Dallas at Buffalo
Sean's Picks of the Week:
After posting a 6 – 8 record, this past week I could not get the following verse out of my head from the song, “Always Look on the Bright Side of Life”: Life's a piece of shit….When you look at it…. Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true. …. You'll see it's all a show …. Keep 'em laughing as you go …. Just remember that the last laugh is on you. …. And always look on the bright side of life... Always look on the right side of life...
Jacksonville over Kansas City – Craig Valentine likes the Jaguars because the Chiefs will not hire his wife. He also loves “Not the Bradys XXX.”
New England over Cleveland – Charlie Sheen likes the Patriots and called Luke Ford “a sad, jobless pig.” He does however love “Not the Bradys XXX.”
New Orleans over Carolina – The boys over at Dane said I should take the Saints. They then told AVN they just love the Panthers. Hey, wait a minute…. They also love “Not the Bradys XXX.”
Giants over Jets – Wanker Wang likes the Giants by 3 and asked if I had a number for attorney Johnnie Cochran. Yeah, 1-800-I’M –DEAD. Wang also loves “Not the Bradys XXX.”
Houston over Miami – Lynn LeMay likes the Texans in this game and says Renaud West wipes his ass with an American flag and punches old women. She also loves “Not the Bradys XXX.”
Pittsburgh over Seattle – Jeri Thompson, wife of GOP presidential candidate Fred Thompson, likes the Steelers by 7. We like Jeri’s tits. WOW! You have our vote, Fred.
Detroit over Washington – Doing his best impression of Moses, Bill Margold likes the Lions and says grooming is highly over rated. Bill also loves “Not the Bradys XXX.”
Tennessee over Atlanta – Greg Sakas likes the Titans by 10 and says he's going to buy dildos in Alabama and what do you think about that?. Greg also can’t keep “Not the Bradys XXX” in stock.
Arizona over St. Louis – Chef Jeff likes the Cardinals and says he's going to watch the game from his favorite city in the state- Surprise. Jeff also loves “Not the Bradys XXX.”
Indianapolis over Tampa – The Grand Vizier takes the Colts and says the real reason why the industry's in the financial mess it's in is because not enough people are listening to the sage advice of Craig Valentine. The Grand Vizier says “Not the Bradys XXX” is a hit.
Baltimore over San Francisco – Jenna Jameson likes the Ravens and admits that there isn’t going to be a movie made about her life although Bea Arthur said count her in. Jenna wishes she was in “Not the Bradys XXX.”
Green Bay over Chicago – Charlie Sheen likes the Packers by 10 and called Bears quarterback Rex Grossman, “a sad, jobless pig.” Charlie gets a phrase in his head, he can’t let it go.
Dallas over Buffalo – Jason Sechrest likes the Cowboys [bareback] and says that if I keep making fun of him he will hit me with his purse. He too loves “Not the Bradys XXX.”
The Adultfyi picks:
Karl the Birdman [41-21]:Jax, Arizona, NE, NO, NY Giants, Pittsburgh, Washington, Houston, Tenn, Indy, Baltimore, SD, Green Bay, Dallas
Sean from www.pornlegends.com [40-22]: Jax, Arizona, NE, NO, NY Giants, Pittsburgh, Detroit, Houston, Tenn, Indy, Baltimore, Denver, GB, Dallas
Billy the Crystal [38-24]: KC, New England, Carolina, NY Jets, Pittsburgh, Washington, Houston, Tenn, Indy SF, SD, Chicago, Dallas
Dan Davis [38-24]: Jax, Arizona, NE, NO, NY Giants, Pittsburgh, Detroit, Houston, Tennessee, Indy, Baltimore, SD, GB, Dallas
Jack Spade [37-25]: Jax, Arizona, New England, NO, NY Jets, Pittsburgh, Washington, Houston, Tennessee, Indy, SF, Denver, GB, Buffalo
Tony Batman [36-26]: Jax, St. Louis, NE, Carolina, NY Giants, Pittsburgh, Detroit, Miami, Tenn, Indy, Baltimore, SD, Chicago, Dallas
Ryan from Jerry's Deli [35-27]: Jax, Arizona, NE, Carolina, NY Jets, Seattle, Detroit, Houston, Tenn, Indy, SF, Denver, Green Bay, Dallas
Gene Ross [35-27]: Jax, Arizona, NE, Carolina, NY Giants, Pittsburgh, Detroit, Houston, Tennessee, Indy Baltimore, Denver, GB, Dallas
Steve Seidman [35-27]: KC, Arizona, NE, Carolina, NY Giants, Pittsburgh, Detroit, Houston, Tennessee, Indy, Baltimore, Denver, Green Bay, Dallas
Indiana Adam [35-27]: Jax, St. Louis, NE, NO, NY Jets, Pittsburgh, Washington, Houston, Tenn, Indy, Baltimore, SD, Green Bay, Dallas
John Gray [35-27]: Jax, St. Louis, NE, NO, NY G, Seattle, Detroit, Houston, Tenn, Indy, Baltimore, San Diego, Green Bay, Dallas
Tim Case [34-28]: Jax, Arizona, NE, Carolina, NY G, Pittsburgh, Detroit, Hst, Tenn, Indy, SF, Denver, GB, Buffalo
Willie D. [34-28]: KC, Arizona, NE, Carolina, NY Giants, Pittsburgh, Detroit, Houston, Tenn, Indy, Baltimore, Denver, GB, Dallas
Brian Wallace [34-28]: Jax, Arizona, New England, Carolina, NY Jets, Pittsburgh, Detroit, Houston, Atlanta, Indy, SF, Denver, Chicago, Dallas
Serenity, www.serenity.net [33-29]: KC, Arizona, NE, Carolina, NY Jets,
Pittsburgh, Detroit, Houston, Tenn, T Bay, SF, Denver, GB, Dallas
Sandy Bunz, www.sandybunz.com [33-29]: KC, Arizona, NE, Carolina, NY Giants, Seattle, Washington, Miami, Tenn, Indy, SF, Denver, Chicago, Buffalo
Mike Dickinson [33-29]: KC, Arizona, NE, NO, New York Jets, SD, Washington, Houston, Tenn, Indy, Balt, SD, Chicago, Dallas
Mastrick [32-30]: Jax, Arizona, NE, Carolina, NY Giants, Pittsburgh, Washington, Houston, Tenn, Indy, SF, Denver, Green Bay, Dallas
Wankus [31-31]: Jax, Arizona, New England, NO, NY Giants, Pittsburgh, Washington, Miami, Tennessee, T Bay, SF, Denver, Chicago, Dallas
Steve Lane, www.serenity.net [30-32]: KC, Arizona, NE, NO, NY Giants, Seattle, Detroit, Houston, Tenn, T Bay, Baltimore, Denver, Green Bay, Dallas
