(SAN FERNANDO VALLEY, CA) — It’s official. The unpublicized star of every show on KSEXradio, is being put out to pasture. The insane staff at the popular adult internet broadcasting company, have decided to put their guest couch up for auction, available to the highest bidder. For two years now, big name adult stars, amateurs and strippers have sat on the KSEX Couch, in some cases just showing a little skin, but in most cases, gettin’ down and dirty. Now is your chance to get your hands on this baby!
“This Porn Star D-N-A Trap,” Program Director, Wankus, remarked, “with the proper help from a good scientist, could make the biggest, hottest, sex clone known to history and now it can be yours!”
Who’s been on the couch you ask?
Akira Lane, Alana Evans, Alaura Eden, Alexa Rae, Alexandra Quinn, Alexandra Silk, Alexis Amore’, Amber Lynn, Ann Marie, Aurora Snow, Bella Maria, Belladonna, BiSexual Britni, Brenda Kelly, Bridgette Kerkove, Brooke Hunter, Calli Cox, Carmen Luvana, Casey Pink, Cashmere, Cheri Roberts, Christi Lake, Cierra Sage, Cindy Crawford, Coral Sands, Cytherea, Daisy [KSEX DJ], Daisy Chain, Daisy Marie, Danny Slam, Deja Chan, Devinn Lane, Devon, Diana Devoe, Elizabeth Starr, Erika Kole, Felicia Fox, Fionna Cheeks, Fujiko, Gauge, Gen Padova, Gina Fine, Ginger Lynn, Heather Lyn, Holly Hollywood, Holly Holstan, Honney Bunny, Houston, Jacklyn Lick, Jasmine Klein, Jenna Haze, Jenna Jameson, Jessica Drake, Jill Kelly, Julie Knight, Justine Romee’, Kat Kleavage, Katarina McKenna, Kate Frost, Katie Morgan, Kaylynn, Keegan Skky, Kennedy [The Bunny Ranch], Keri Windsor, Kiki Daire’, Kim Chambers, Kylie Samone, Kylie Wilde, Lainey X, Lana Cox, LaTia Lopez, Latin Lisa, Layla Jade, Leanna Ramone, Linda Tran, Lisa Sparxxx, Lolana, Mandy Malone, Mari Possa, Mary Carey, Max Hardcore with Catalina, Melissa Ashley, Mercedes Ashley, Michele Raven, Michelle Lay, Monique Alexander, Montana Gunn, Naked Nicole, Nautica Binx, Nicole Moore, Nikita Kash, Nikki Fairchild, Nikki November Sam Phillips, Nina Whett, Olivia Saint, Pamela Peaks, Rhiannon Bray, Rubee Tuesday, Ryan Conner, Samantha Sterlyng, Sara Jay, Scott and Brandi Lyons, Sexy Veronika, Sharon Mitchell, Sharon Wild, Shay Sights, Sierra, Sinnamon, Snakebabe, Star E. Knight, Summer Haze, Summer Luv [Of course she walked out of the studio angry], Tabitha Stevens, Tawny Roberts, Taylor Rain, Tera Patrick, Tiffany Storm, Tiger Lily, Tina Cheri, Tina Toy, Tina Tyler, Vandalia, Vanessa Blue, Venus, Veronica Hart, Vicki Valencourt, Victoria Givens, Violet Blue, XXX Dynamite
…as well as hundreds of more adult actress, amateurs and strippers!
“And, at least 85% of all those listed,” Wankus claimed, “got it on–big time! Some masturbated, gave head, got oral, got fucked, took a pee, 69ed, etc. You name it, it’s been done on that couch.”
General Manager, Chris Rick said, “Don’t worry, the KSEX Tech Team bleached the hell of that puppy so it’s sanitary. But, the memories never left the cushions and your friends will envy you.”
The auction is being held on the web site www.auctions-world.com, with the specific bidding page being [http://auctions-world.com/XcAPViewItem.asp?ID=176]. Bidding will begin at $200.00 and the person with the highest bid will not only get the couch, but will also be able to pick their favorite star off the above list and receive picture galleries, video clips and review package [with footage of them on the couch], to authenticate the whole package. Depending on who their favorite star is, KSEX claims they may even be able to get the babe to sign it for fans personally, before it ships.
If the top bidder is in the Southern California area, they can pick it up from the KSEX studios and sit in on a live show. Those who can’t pick it up, must pay a UPS charge of $449.00, on top of their final bid purchase price.
Doing this for a noble cause? “Fuck no,” joked Wankus, “we need a new couch!”