Just because you’re eating jizz doesn’t mean you can’t eat healthy.

A nice salad is the perfect bed for August’s load in Way #5 of the Arkham chronicles: 1001 Ways to Eat My Jizz, where various versions of his semen topped edibles are fed to hungry participants.

This was also done in the epic 70’s porn Barbara Broadcast. It takes place in this surreal sex restaurant in New York. A woman calls a waiter over and says, “I’d like a number 7 please” (or something like that) and the waiter proceeds to jerk off in the salad. Don’t know if she ate the salad.

It’s a classic scene in a classic movie. In fact, Barbara Broadcast was the movie that made me want to be in the adult business. I saw it when it first came out in the 70’s. It played in a theater in Houston that I snuck into with a fake ID. Yes, they used to have porno in theaters, kids.

This scene features the MILFesque Rubee Tuesday. A woman who likes to watch what she eats. August, being the caring psychopath that he is, gives her his protein dressing served on nutritious greens. Bon appetit!