Porn Valley- Skeeter Kerkove was still wishing Kevin Rubio a happy birthday even when informed it wasn't the Count Ducati's time to light the candles.
"I love the threads he writes," says Skeeter. "He writes about himself in the third person and he writes about we here at Ducati Productions and he'll talk about Kevin Ducati in another person. And then he talks about the actor Rockin Rod [Rubio's alter ego].
"I figured out what he's doing, and I know it's only my opinion because I'm a dingbat- there's this one thread where they're talking about doing anal on the belly and Kevin Ducati chimes in oh, Rockin' Rod's favorite position is this and he likes this; it's so funny because he's talking about himself.
"And he loves the word 'we.' If you've been to the Ducati Ranch like I have, you'll see what Ducati Productions is. In my opinion only- porn furniture worse than the porn furniture I used to have."
"You've been to the Ducati Ranch?" I ask Skeeter in awe.
"There's two of them," he says. "I was to the first Ducati Ranch when I was dating this girl- she was so hot- Naudia Rio. She had the biggest ass, 5'10" and the biggest natural lips on a girl ever in the history of porn who wasn't blacker than the Ace of spades.
"She was enthralled because she met the Count Ducati- she believed everything he said that I'll make you the biggest star and you'll be rich and you'll do the websites and the content exchange. You sign the model release and take a strap-on and fuck me in the butt real quick. 'You'll learn to like dominating men.'
"So she was with me for a while and he didn't know it," Skeeter continues. "So Count Ducati would be calling her, and he would do this little crybaby voice- and just so you know I'm being serious and not fucking around- I swear this on my family.
"He'd be, like, 'Don't you love me annnnymore? Don't you miss me? I'm just sitting here cryin.' I really want you to come over.'
"God, he says all this shit to everybody- Vickie Richter the T-girl; Danielle Fox, the T-girl; Christine Agava the Mexican crack head. Everybody. He does this baby voice. There's not a woman in the world that wants to hear that. And I don't know why any guy would think that's going to help them reel in a girl. But it was just creepy. Then she [Rio] told him, hey, 'I'm here with Skeeter Kerkove.'
"That's how I met The Count, and Naudia's, like, whoa, I'm strung out on drugs. I met him. He made me all these promises, but I had to have sex with him; and it was awful and I played the game. I just can't take it. Please, let me stay with you.
"I'm, like, I've got an old lady- she don't like me very much but I go over there. But whenever I left Naudia here at the house, she kept everything spotless. She didn't touch nothing. She didn't go through drawers. She didn't do nothing. She just minded her p's and q's. Plus I filmed her like ten times and it was good. I got a lot out of her.
"I just loved looking at her and loved fucking her," Skeeter goes on to say. "I loved watching her smoke sexy for me. Her lips were entirely too big and she was so tall. I thought she was so hot and she had the biggest, fattest, pronounced camel toes, I just loved.
"She had that sassy, defined ass where you clearly see the line between the buttcheek and the top of the thigh. If she does a walk you see the crack the whole time going left to right. And she had that posture where she leaned back and it exaggerated it even more more. I didn't want to bring that to her attention and make her conscious of it and lose this natural butt walk that she had that she wasn't aware of. She walked just so fucking good."
"She never asked for nothing, not for a penny. She bought all her own food when she was here; all of her own cigarettes. She didn't ask for shit.
"This is what really imnpressed me with the girl," Skeeter continues. "I filmed her three times, and I was writing her a check telling her save your money, do this, do that. She's, like, you let me stay here, you don't have to pay me for those last three movies. I said okay, I'll make you a deal- what if I just take 25% off but right now we go spend it on my kids. Right now. That way it's all cool. She said cool. That's what we did.
"She was a good girl- she just got back into the drug use. Oh, God, it was crazy. One day her dad came to my house. I had no warning of this. She goes, oh, I didn't tell you baby? I invited my dad- I wanted you guys to meet. I don't want to meet nobody's dad. Not when I'm fucking their daughter in the ass and having six guys fuck his daughter in the ass. You'll never believe what he said to me. I was appalled.
"He says he wants to talk to me, right? We go in the back yard. He goes can I have one of your cigarettes? He says why don't you go inside and get something to drink. I'm thinking what is he- trying to make a move on me and hurt me? I'm thinking I don't care if this is your old man, this ain't going to happen. He comes back inside and puts his hand on my shoulder.
"He goes, 'What can we do to both make money off my daughter?' I'm, like, whoa. You really are a dope fiend. He goes, well, she's been hooking for years; I think she's been on the streets since 14 in Vegas. I go what the fuck were you doing? Your fucking daughter's on the street at 14 being a hooker? I go why didn't you call the cops. He goes I was too high chasing the bag all the time. I go you and I ain't going to make any money off your daughter. That's it. I go I'm going to hire your daughter one more time because I got her cast in my last movie but this is it. This is really weird- you being at my house wanting to know what you and I can do to make money off your daughter.
"I go that's just fucking wrong. Nobody should want their kid in this business because it's just too mean, nasty and brutal. It's too unforgiving. One time on frame with the Internet, you are porn for life. I had no idea what the Internet was when Bridgette and I got in porn. I underestimated everything and made a big mistake. It's too late now. But I didn't know."
Skeeter thinks Rio might have been repped by Pamela Peaks.
"That's the last person I was aware of," he says. "A little over a year ago."
Skeeter gos on to talk about how Max Hardcore had been to his house the other night.
"Max and I just partied like crazy," says Skeeter. "We go down to the liquor store and the guy's just having a fit: I can't believe Max Hardcore and Skeeter is in my store. He takes pictures of us. Then Rachel Love called. She wanted to come over and party. She said can I spend the night? I go fuck, yeah, you can spend the night. The little thing weighs about 100 pounds. She has rules- not too hard."
