Jessica Darlin posts at www.jessicadarlinxxx.com: I know there's people who read my journal and sweat the whole way through. When they realize that they've been spared they can breath again. Don't feel comfy guys I'm just getting around to you. Imagine being away from your writing outlet and then being unleashed. I just have to figure out where the attacks begin. I did a long journal entry about REGRET yesterday. It chronicled some people I regretted putting my mouth on but it mysteriously disappeared. Either way I have it saved on my Microsoft works and I'll just try to insert it each day until it WORKS!
I've really separated myself from the business and I truly have no idea of the fresh meat. The idea of getting back in the business crosses my mind. During my health issues I tried to get rid of my pain. In the process I numbed my sex drive. Out of the haze I can see clearly now-the rain is gone! It's gonna be a bright, bright, bright-Cum filled day! I want to work myself back into the business by creating new relationships involving content for this site. With the internet exploitation of our business and the mainstream media getting a hold of it you'll have to pick through the fame whores to find the SLUTS! Maybe the business will get so watered down that it won't be cool anymore. From there the urges of the guys-girls-and guy/girls will show themselves.
I really settled down and took a look back at the last seven years. I think of the people I met and what's happened to them. They told me that I wouldn't last but I watched contract girl after contract girl fade as I stood strong. There were attacks on my tattoo's, on my marriage, on my career choices, and they all said I'd be done before you knew it. I not only stood my ground but I was the first contract girl to shatter the interracial boundries set by the Asia Carrera's and the Jenna'a. I would later regret the way I was used to break that trend! I was the first contract girl with a tattoo of my size. I went to tons of photo shoots and was accepted till the tattoo peered out. I fought the whole way until they realized they couldn't get rid of me.
From that point the lower back tattoo became popular and now it's one of my biggest regrets. Fucking tribal tattoos are sacred to other cultures and my dumb young white ass thought it was cool. Tribal tattoos on white people are retarded! I know if you got it while the fad was cool your hating it now. LOL Hell-girls like Janine have all types of ink now and it's sexy. I'm glad because I'm about to get both arms half-sleeved by my IDOL Troy Lane at AAA tattoo's in Miami. I want people to know that the trend of girls working with she-males came from my blacklist. MARTYR J.D! (Inside hardcore joke) I was the first big girl to work with them non condom and I paid for it with career suicide. I did Vanity and then Evil put a bunch of hype into Bella's scene. Didn't nacho wear a condom in that scene-even with Bella? Weren't they going out at the time? Where's the risk in that? She did win an award for it. I talked to Tim Conelly from AVN and he said how hot it was. He had that craving for cock look in his eyes-it kind've spooked me-Had to GO. Bella gets credit but I broke the rules! She was also with Evil and had their backing. When the shit hit the fan at Anabolic over Jennifer's HIV+ diagnosis they left me out to dry. When I get back in the business I'll speak to the new girls about the damage that can be done if you don't back your actions. For a girl like Kristi Myst who had unrivaled good looks all it took was some trust in the people she worked for to ruin her life. She's the most beautiful face to ever grace a box cover and what happened? People saw that as an opportunity to knock her down. My website will chronicle the everyday happenings in the business.
I want every new girl to read my journal and then take the time to write me. [email protected]-I'll give them the information needed to make the right choices. I'll give them the help they'll need to say NO. A NO that can be the difference between life and death. Fighting an industry that hammers it's prey you need to have your guard up. I'll have dirt on every person that talks out of the side of their neck and the GOOD people that will help you succeed. I met Ian Daniels, when I walked into the business and the first cock that went up my ass gave me some advice. He helped me pave the way for the future. Jim South might not pound the pavement for you but he treated me like a lady in a whores business and I'll never leave his agency because of that. I'll tell the new girls to work the companies with vigor but have Jim behind you. Back to Ian. He told me things about a future boss and some tendencies he had with violence towards women. I didn't listen and then watched first hand as the cowards revealed themselves. I was able to control my destiny but other girls weren't that fortunate.
You have to have a keen sense of trust to be able to maneuver through the battlefield. I'm going to be the guide that gets the new bees there. I'll also never pull up short when it comes to my opinions and naming names. There's plenty of dirt that came to the surface about me and my past. I'll be sure to clear the air before they do. I'm going to hit every topic on the way to my best seller. You'll get an inside look into the mind of the scorned reflecting on a business that I love! Stick with me-War is coming. A reflection on the pre-election HYPE and the people who couldn't have been more wrong tomorrow. Brace yourself LIMPS! Jess's political capital is about to be SPENT! (Movie title)
