Porn Valley- The NY Post first broke the story. And it was a shocker: Tera Patrick's suing Jenna Jameson and Playboy. Well, actually it's Club Tera suing Club Jenna and Club Playboy for money in Los Angeles Superior Court and you wonder if the club houses will ever be the fun places they were after this.
With the rules of arbitration in play, it gets pretty involved. Playboy, which bought Club Jenna last June for over $17 M- a deal they've probably been second guessing ever since- doesn't want to play ball, according to some reports.
So far Bunnyville not only has refused arbitration but has been extremely thrifty in the volunteering of numbers. Something called complete disclosure. Club Tera is saying it's owed something like $25,000 which sounds more like a limo ride to Forbidden City considering that Evan Seinfeld's been on Adam Carolla claiming the company is worth millions.
When it comes down to it, this matter is basically about website accounting and it brings into play arcane terms nobody knows shit about like joins- not to be confused with Johns, upsells and revenue streams- not to be confused with the Kenny Rogers' hit song from the Eighties, Islands in the Stream.
Basically Club Tera, which entered a five year contract with Club Jenna, is saying that Club Jenna screwed them- street lingo for breach of contract, alter ego liability, unjust enrichment and all those lawyer terms to indicate that it had been snookered. Allegedly.
And on the subject of snookering you just know Nikki Benz and Lucy Lee, Lucy Li, Lucy Loo will be rooting on Tera Patrick and Club Teravision.
Patrick's no stranger to the court room, either, having earned her name in a brutally fought legal contest with Digital Playground a few years ago. And a good thing, too, because Patrick could have wound up with a performing name like Selma Krznicki and this would have been about Kzrnickivision.
On her side Patrick's got Evan Seinfeld, not to be confused with Jerry Seinfeld but almost as funny. In the tale of the tape, Evan has infinitely more tattoos than UFC icon Tito Ortiz and could probably kick Tito's ass in a caged lipo suck match.
Patrick has also got attorney David Beitchman, known in some circles as "the pit bull." Beitchman you may recall repped Mary Carey against Mariah Carey in a court case everyone's forgotten about.
Meanwhile Playboy is repped by Moskowitz, Brestoff, Winston & Blinderman, and it's not clear whether any of them have colorful nicknames. Club Jenna, on the other hand, is repped by Gary "the assassin" Crandell.
When it comes down to it, though, Jenna can shrewdly play the sympathy angle. Capable of exchanging body weights at will, Jenna's ultimate strategy might be to shrink down to 55 pounds and go on MySpace declaring how this legal fracas played on her nerves.
And where would that leave Krznickivision in the court of public opinion?
